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harmfuljays
King of Men
Joined: 18 Oct 2007
Posts: 1507
Location: Djibouti
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 Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 11:29 am Post subject: The Family Unit |
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An open post to people who think they know better.
Please everyone stay out of the Family's business. Just because you are a caregiver, or a doctor, a lawmaker or a teacher doesn't give you the right to offer your opinion on how I should raise my children.
The child is mine until it can fend for itself.
If I ask you for your opinion by all means give it. Otherwise mind your own business.
If I am disciplining my child and you don't like it go pound sand because unless you are going to physically confront me I will ignore you or tell you to go get stuffed.
If you are a doctor.....just because you know intimate details of our lives does not make you the be all end all of child development. If my wife wants to breastfeed until the kid is 18 months and have African village titties than that's no concern of yours. My child does not need to see a therapist for eating solids nor take vitamins, nor does the child need flu shots (last I checked Breastmilk was good for all of those things).
If my son screws up some words and has a little lisp that's ok he's 3 years old....he doesn't need to see a speech therapist (and his speech developed just fine without one). If he has a limited attention span that's ok too because he's a 6 year old boy..he doesn't have ADHD that needs medication.....he's just a 6 yr old boy that lacks discipline.
If my daughter doesn't feel like walking yet....she won't....she's very young and she will do it in time. She doesn't need to see anyone or have special attention paid to her.
If I dangle my baby over a ledge and wave at crowds, If I drive with my baby on my lap in front of the Paparazzi, If I smoke around my kids or feed them Mcdonalds all day long.....none of this is truly your concern. Unless you want to take an active part in the day to day workings of my family unit and contribute in an effective manner your laws and opinions mean nothing to me. They will be greeted with defiance, outright dismissal and occasionally a middle finger.
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E.L.3000
Big in Japan
Joined: 18 Oct 2007
Posts: 1783
Location: Fuck tha MTL police
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| Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 11:40 am Post subject: |
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Something on your mind there, chief?
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It seems like you need to be a physics professor to choose the right TV. Luckily, I am one.
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13utchy
Now with 30% more rage!
Joined: 29 Oct 2007
Posts: 763
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| Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 11:47 am Post subject: Re: The Family Unit |
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| harmfuljays wrote: |
| If my wife wants to breastfeed until the kid is 18 months and have African village titties than that's no concern of yours. |
DUDE!!!!  
I had to see a speech therapist when I was around 8 yrs old .... She used to give me ET stickers for speaking properly.
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My anger is a gift! |
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the New Cunning Linguist
Like a good neighbor, only better
Joined: 18 Oct 2007
Posts: 1962
Location: I'm here, aren't I?
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| Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 12:05 pm Post subject: |
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Then you probably want no part of this... And no, this is all fiction...
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... Because the old one, is well, old.
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harmfuljays
King of Men
Joined: 18 Oct 2007
Posts: 1507
Location: Djibouti
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| Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 12:09 pm Post subject: |
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I pick my children up every day.....I do the laundry, I sometimes cook dinner...........its called a family. I buy into the unit all the way.
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13utchy
Now with 30% more rage!
Joined: 29 Oct 2007
Posts: 763
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| Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 12:14 pm Post subject: |
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| the New Cunning Linguist wrote: |
| Then you probably want no part of this... And no, this is all fiction... |
I'm still haunted by this crazy broad I used to date who would bitch that I was vacuuming .... at the wrong time! (Because it was 10pm & she was resting).
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My anger is a gift! |
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Chuck
Joined: 19 Oct 2007
Posts: 169
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| Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 1:09 pm Post subject: Re: The Family Unit |
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| harmfuljays wrote: |
If I dangle my baby over a ledge and wave at crowds, If I drive with my baby on my lap in front of the Paparazzi, If I smoke around my kids or feed them Mcdonalds all day long.....none of this is truly your concern. |
See, I was with ya until there. I reserve the right to call someone out for being a cockholster.
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My blog is more awesome then your face |
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harmfuljays
King of Men
Joined: 18 Oct 2007
Posts: 1507
Location: Djibouti
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| Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 3:49 pm Post subject: Re: The Family Unit |
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But see it truly doesn't concern you (you, does not = Chuck). Unless you feel that you have the necessary means and parenting skills to assist in the upbringing of said child. If you'd like to subsidize meals, shelter, excercise and education then by all means offer your non-solicited advice all day.
Otherwise I expect you to do your job if you deal directly with Children (Teach, check for issues, etc.) and not offer your opinion from your high horse. And if you don't deal directly with children and are just a fellow parent than you should not be offering me any unsolicited advice. Your style is different and so is mine so don't interfere unless I ask.
So while the examples I listed may be extreme and truly dangerous in the long term (and/or short term if the "IF"s occur) I am merely attempting to illustrate that's it is none of your business because you do not contribute directly to that family unit. The constitution theoretically grants every person the right to speak his mind without censorship but not without fear of repercussion.
There are only 3 circumstances where I would expect unsolicited intervention or respect someone else's opinion; severe physical abuse, sexual assault, and deteriorating health/malnourishment.
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E.L.3000
Big in Japan
Joined: 18 Oct 2007
Posts: 1783
Location: Fuck tha MTL police
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| Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 3:57 pm Post subject: |
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I might not be in a position to tell you anything (you, does not = Harmfuljays), but I can tell you whatever I damn well please if I so desire. You just don't have to take it.
Does it make me an asshole? Hell yes.
If I think you're doing something abhorrent like feeding a six-month old whiskey from a bottle, I probably won't care what you think about me, I might say something.
Last summer I was taking the number 6 train to Queens from Manhattan, and across from me was a young Mexican family with two horribly obese kids (around 2-3 years old). The one girl was panting horribly just sitting on her mom's lap. The mom, this is 100% true, was feeding her daughter Orange Crush from a baby bottle and feeding her Cheetos. The kid was smearing cheeto dust all over her face and getting it in her eyes.
I had a few choice words I wanted to tell her in Spanish, but kept to myself. Truth be told, that mother was killing her kids (there was a dad there too, BTW).
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It seems like you need to be a physics professor to choose the right TV. Luckily, I am one.
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harmfuljays
King of Men
Joined: 18 Oct 2007
Posts: 1507
Location: Djibouti
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| Posted: Thu Mar 06, 2008 4:33 pm Post subject: |
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I have noticed a lot of people that like to offer their opinions don't have kids and are supremely overconfident in their personal values....I am certainly no exception in the latter as you can tell.  But it doesn't mean I don't consider other views.
I am not an expert on anything...I don't profess to be. In fact I know very little truth. My knowledge is opinions based on my experience and the experience of others, little more. There are no facts, only interpretations (Straight Nietzsche....feel the paradox growing!) So would I decide to offer my unsolicited opinion to another parent? Is it to make me feel better....because chances are it certainly won't be doing any good to the recipient. And that's what bothers me most...people who think or profess to know and try to admonish or belittle me based on their "knowledge" (such as Doctors in this case).
Just because I think I know what's best for that parent doesn't mean I am going to tell them. And If I did I would almost certainly put the decision squarely back in their court. I know what it is like to be a parent and its all about choices right or wrong that's not for me to decide.
But hey that's just my take you know? I realize my Jacko illustration wasn't really helping me out.. 
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Bell Centre Ghost
Haunting the Bell Centre since 2005
Joined: 18 Oct 2007
Posts: 537
Location: Guelph
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| Posted: Sat Mar 08, 2008 3:35 pm Post subject: |
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I'm with ya Jay. Which makes my line of work all the more difficult. If I suspect any form of abuse, from the obvious bad stuff right down to the occasional slap or verbal abuse, then I'm bound to report to FCS..... and I'm hearing that that is not always a good thing, as parents are often at the mercy of the system afterwards. It's difficult because there is nothing the parent can do about anything. Decisions are usually up to an overworked (a.k.a. jaded) social worker who will then tend to plop families into "boxes", i.e. situations they either often see or have particularly impacted them, and make decisions accordingly.
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The fans represent the soul of the organization. This is their team. Us, we simply try to make it better. They tell us when things are going good, and when they are less so. We don't always give them the impression that we are listening, but we are. |
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Captain Chaos
(Formerly Lieutenant Chaos)
Joined: 18 Oct 2007
Posts: 450
Location: Vancouver
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| Posted: Sat Mar 08, 2008 4:13 pm Post subject: |
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| E.L.in.H.D. wrote: |
Last summer I was taking the number 6 train to Queens from Manhattan, and across from me was a young Mexican family with two horribly obese kids (around 2-3 years old). The one girl was panting horribly just sitting on her mom's lap. The mom, this is 100% true, was feeding her daughter Orange Crush from a baby bottle and feeding her Cheetos. The kid was smearing cheeto dust all over her face and getting it in her eyes.
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wow.... |
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